D-Day has finally arrived. The day Hunter has been counting down to since the end of Marching Band season is upon us. Daily he gave a rolling countdown for all to see (and be reminded of again.....and again......and again). To Hunter this day was better than Christmas, Birthday and all combined......he COULD NOT WAIT to go out with his brothers and sisters and learn together a show that promised to be one to remember for many years to come. INFECTED........zombies, drama, amazing musical choices......this show is like none other and Hunter considered himself blessed to be able to be a part of it. He obsessed, he practiced and he did everything he could possibly do to prepare for this day but most importantly he couldn't wait to be reunited with his people and start making new memories together.....to Hunter, that was priceless.
I remember watching Hunter and his friends learn what the new show was at their year end banquet. Their excitement honestly could not be contained. And as details of the new show unfolded their shouts and fist pumps of joy got louder and went higher. By the end they were sitting with their arms around one another talking non stop about how awesome this show was going to be......their brotherhood bond shined brighter than ever in that moment. I too was amazed at the directors choices and vision for the show (I would have loved to be a part of it too). I sat there imagining watching Hunter out on the field putting on the show of his life and seeing him revel in the sheer joy it would bring. I couldn't WAIT for us to watch him LIVE again, to hear the smooth tunes of his tenor saxophone and to watch his steps of precision all over the field. I couldn't wait to shamelessly video each and every performance, and to grab a few selfies with him (and any friends who happened to cross our paths). To be able to experience those moments with him was far more valuable than anything money could buy......
But those moments were not meant to be. Today his band mates went through their first day without Hunter there. I've heard from many and they all have a heaviness on them, many reflecting on their time with Hunter or supporting him by wearing his favorite band t shirts, they each faced a day that is not one we ever want to face. My prayers have been with them all day and I will continue to pray that the days get better and that this heaviness will be replaced by joy and remembrance. Hunter would not want his band mates to cry, he would want them to band together and make this show the best it can possibly be. He would want them to help each other out, including the newbies to marching. He would want them to laugh with one another and encourage one another. He would want them to continue playing "The Game" and to carry one with traditions they made last year. He would want the band to bond closer as a family and in the end produce an amazing show that they can ALL be proud of.......he would also want them to know that he is there with them in every practice and every performance cheering them on. He is also there to comfort them as they work through their grieving process and experience sad moments. He wouldn't want them to stay in the darkness for too long.......he would want them to SHINE.
For me (as well as Lance, I'm sure) it's been an emotional day. It's one of the many "reality checks" we will face as we move throughout our own grieving process. Today I will not get a call to fill me in on the entire day's events. I won't get random texts, some with pictures and some simply saying "I love you mom". Through my tears I can hear Hunter saying "Suck it up, mom, don't cry for me".....it gives me comfort but it's very hard not to feel the sadness. Somehow in the midst of all this there HAS to be some kind of light. Today was a step for many.....tomorrow is another step, praying that God will give us ALL strength as we continue to move forward.
To the Bradley Bear Pride Band........play that music and play it LOUD. Hunter loved you with all that was in him, and he valued your friendships more than you know. As his mother I thank you for being so good to him. You guys made his final year amazing, and I can't thank you enough for that. I look forward to seeing you guys in action on the football field this year. Bear Pride!
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